Going Out…Coming In

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As each year begins…I start with goals. Not resolutions…but goals. Resolutions tend to be broken. Sometimes not taken seriously. It tends to be what others are doing. You can start them but the majority of the time, not finish them. Goals, on the other hand, keeps you focus on a plan that can help with your growth. Not a part of the masses, but personal. They are written, maintained and adjusted accordingly as growth is obtained.

2016.

I made goals to get back into acting, to have my online magazine in print, to travel more, to read more, to learn more about my heritage, and letting go of a ghost love and being open to the possibilities of love. I must say, through all the trials and tribulations I went through. I actually completed a lot of what I wanted to do, adjusting the plan as I moved along and clearly missing the mark at times.
The beginning of 2016 started well with my first award for my magazine, a possible reality show and more growth for my radio show. By the time April came and after my yearly trip to New York, things seemed to not be was told to me, and even though I sought out advice, who warned me to walk away, I still tried to make it right and it almost destroyed me. The devastation of lies and deceit brought me to my knees. I am a very private person, and try to keep things to myself. I learned through the years that everyone does not have my best interest at heart. So, I keep my personal life very private and only seek out advice from those who I really trust. What I put on social media is only what I want anyone to know. But, this time around, I was very happy to have the very few friends I do have, around me to help me through that very difficult time.
But…I have been through the worst. Molested, raped, homeless. I can get through this. And I did. One thing for sure. Once you stop feeling sorry for yourself, you and only you can pull yourself from the curb and back onto the sidewalk. Walking the opposite way of the masses, of course, because I am still different and have my own mind. I was down for a bit but I am back up and back to the grind.
Let’s see…I went o Dallas and reviewed my first play, and they are still asking me to come back. I have more content to the magazine, which now includes two websites, attended more events that got the magazine notice more and printed the first issue in December, which was such a big hit. I started reading more about African History, which has really open my eyes to a lot of what is going on today. The radio was doing well and then people started falling off, I had to cancel until February 2017, but to my surprise fans sending emails and inboxes wanting it back on and saying how much they enjoyed the show. Finally, cast in a play that will premiere in February. I did finally make the decision to let go of the ghost love. I had to…I was comparing anyone I meet to this person and it wasn’t fair to the prospects or to me. I still dream of him and will definitely he will always be in my heart. (It’s always that one, right?) But, I am ready to date and eventually have a relationship and get married, and have someone to share all the wonderful things that will happen with me.
2017.
My goals are to:
Increase the magazine readership.
Host and attend more events.
Learn more about my history.
Bring the radio show back and discuss issues that affect the Black Community.
When I travel, make time to interview Black Owned Businesses.
Be open to dating.
Pretty much same goals as last year. But, with a little more substance. Staying on track will be key. And remembering if I want it…it’s not going to come easy. There will be some hard times and road blocks. All I have to do is remember…Relax…Think it out…and I will get around it and over it. Just don’t give up.
Happy New Year!
Always LOVE